The Female Species

I have a lot of "female" friends. By that, I mean chicks that know I feel them and they've showed interest in me, as well. A few I would definitely go to the next step with, but for what ever reason there's a trait in every female that does not let them go after guys, only to let guys chase them. When I was younger I used to chase them back till I got what want from them. Especially my ex. Which actually I think is the reason we were together for as long as we were. Since I've been single, I've been waiting on a girl to show genuine interest in me. Yeah, if I hit up a number of girls they will hit me with the "Heyyy!!!", or a response that proves that they are happy I contacted them. However, a few days later I'm stuck thinking, maybe I should text so & so, but then I think, "has she EVER initiated and conversation with me?" And put my phone down.

In my first couple months of being single this type of stuff hit me hard. One, I was already tremendously lonely, so I felt like I NEEDED attention from a female to get through the day. Two, There was only a small number of girls that I even had this "type" of relationship with (will elaborate on this "type" later). So I was texting the same girls EVERY day, and the conversations went the same way every time. "Hey whats up?" "Nothing. Just ____. You?" "Just chillin.." Then I would try to find something to squeeze out of them to make an interesting conversation. Which failed, time after time.

After a month or two after that, I began to realize I don't need attention from chick, or anyone for that matter, to be happy. At the same, I don't know what happened, but I did get more girls coming my way, with me sending them that way, of course. I have became really fond of being single and able to do what I want, talk to who I want, and just being independent...

[Side Note] Let me explain what I was talking about earlier real quick. When I meant "type" of relationship, I meant basically what I said at the beginning of this post, the girl and I have an understanding that we both are interested in each other. Meaning we both have intentions of hanging out with another and getting to know each other more. [/Side Note]

So now I'm in a position where I have girls I know I can chill with if I really want to, but I simply don't really put in an effort to because I feel like I'm the only one putting in a effort. I have been debating with myself if I just need to suck up my pride (pause) and do my thing with them, because its just how woman are. But I feel like I will just come out as sounding desperate or being too into them too soon. Then I begin to feel maybe they really just aren't into me like that, or else they would be hitting me up, trying to get to know me. So I am left confused...

So the past few days, I really have not talked to any of my female friends... I don't know. I'm sick of being the one initiating things. I'm I wrong for wanting a girl to make a move first?

After that question, I don't have much else to say... Thanks for reading this entirely too long thought from head. I like to call this freestyle writing. I know the purpose but no set direction. So take it for what it is. I'd love feedback for this one, so comment, hit me up on facebook or twitter, whatever. Have a good night/day.

AyVee